Every Town Has
A liar.
A sponger.
A smart Aleck.
A blatherskite.
Its richest man.
Some pretty girls.
A girl who giggles.
A weather profet.
A neighborhood feud.
Half a dozen lunatics.
A woman who tattles.
A man who knows it all.
One jacksonian Democrat.
More loafers than it needs.
Men who see every dog fight.
A boy who cuts up in church.
A few meddlesome old women.
A "thing" that stares at women.
A stock law that is not enforced.
A widower who is too gay for his age.
Some men who make remarks about women.
A preacher who thinks he ought to run the town.
A few who know how to run the affairs of the country.
A grown young man who laughs every time he says anything.
A girl who goes to the post-office every time the mail comes.
Men who had rather shed blood than be corrected in an error.
A legion of smart Alecks who can tell the editor how to run his paper.
Scores of men with the caboose of their trousers worn smooth as glass.
A man who grins when you talk and laughs out loud after he has said something.
All towns are blessed with the above to a greater or less extent. You can amuse yourself filling in the blanks for your town.
[Murfreesboro Index (Murfreesboro, NC) 24 Jan 1896]
